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Wednesday, November 27, 2013

The Ultimate Thanksgiving Dinner

It’s Thanksgiving, and like most families, the ultimate family gathers each year for the holiday.  Here’s who’s coming to dinner this week: 

Stephen Poulos (Ring of Fire): The out-there uncle, who never really recovered from the early 1970s. 

Josh Zipperstein: The cousin who seems like he has been in grad school forever.  Seriously, wasn’t he already working on that degree when you graduated high school? 

Michele NG (Without Limits): The cousin who’s really into social activism and makes you feel kind of guilty for not doing more to help the world. 

Charlie Eisenhood (Ultiworld): The one who’s constantly taking notes “for his novel.”  He’s probably never going to finish it. 

Beau Kittredge (Spiders): Your older brother who still thinks he could’ve gone pro after college.  He’ll remind you of that every time a receiver drops a pass during the Thanksgiving Day games. 

Tiina Booth (ARHS): Your recently retired aunt who’s living it up now that she has some free time.  She can drink you all under the table. 

Opi (Scandal):  The ex who keeps getting an invite because everyone likes her more than whichever cousin she actually used to date. 

Tom Crawford (USAU): The grandfather who’s probably going to have a few too many drinks and start letting you all know how disappointed he is in you. 

Leila Tunnell (Brutesquad): Your sister who just loves singing, and keeps trying to get the Christmas carols started a month early.  You’re not having any of it. 

Elliot Trotter (Rainmakers): The gay one.  Or, at least, that’s how your grandmother sees him now that he’s “all open about his lifestyle.” 

Jeff Snader (MLU): The uncle whose business has really taken off this year, and who won’t shut up about it.  Just nod and smile. 

Robert Lloyd (AUDL): The rich uncle that everyone is unnaturally nice to, so they don’t get written out of the will.  

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