Oregon Fugue Outraged at Poor Media Coverage

MADISON—The University of Oregon (Fugue) capped off a truly spectacular season today with a dominant 15-8 victory over Carleton (Syzygy) in the finals of the Women’s division.  But Fugue is anything but satisfied with the media coverage of the USAU College Championships. 

“It was atrocious,” said a visibly frustrated Sophie Darch at her post-tournament press conference.  “I mean, obviously I haven’t seen the footage of today, since we were too busy crushing Carleton in the finals.  But last night I watched the ESPN3 archives of the early rounds.  It was just sad.  You could tell the announcers were really mailing it in.” 

ESPN joined USAU for the College Championships this year, bringing an unprecedented level of exposure to the sport through ESPN3 online live-streaming and archive services and ESPNU tape-delay broadcasts. 

 “We’re really conflicted right now,” said Oregon coach Lou Burruss. “I mean, on the one hand, we’re proud of our team for pulling out the title.  We really stayed focused and did what we needed to do to win.  But I mean, seriously, what the crap, ESPN?  Was this your first time ever broadcasting ultimate or something?  Some of those camera angles were really weak, and the commentary was superficial to say the least.  We could use a little professionalism.” 

“It’s like…do they think we just do all this for fun?” said Fugue’s Jesse Shofner.  “That we work this hard, practice this long, play this much, just for fun?  Of course we don’t.  We do it so we’ll have awesome camera angles of us tooling on noobs with a sweet voiceover telling everyone how badass we are.”

"Honestly, we weren't even going to play this year," said Shofner.  "But when we heard that ESPN was doing the coverage we were like, 'Alright, hell yeah, let's do it.  Let's go get some kickass highlights.'  But now, I don't know...we just feel cheated.  It's kind of a hollow victory."    

Scores of ultimate players have taken to Twitter and Facebook to voice their displeasure with ESPN and support of Fugue’s position.  

ESPN could not be reached for comment.  There’s probably basketball tonight.